Why You’re Exactly Where You Should Be

Sometimes the place we’re in can really be a major bummer.  Things like losing a job, moving to a new place, or moving on from a relationship can spin us into a place of wanting to force everything to be okay, right now, when it simply can’t.  Accepting what is, turning inward, and giving yourself time to allow things to flow on their own will empower you to make the right choices and open your heart and mind up to amazing opportunities that may come your way.

Lately I’ve been feeling like many things in my life are in a place of transition.  While most of it is great and much needed, change is still not always easy.  One of the most important things I remind myself of is that it’s not necessary to know all the answers right now, and that they’ll come when the time is right, every time.

When the pressure is off to force answers before they’re ready to appear, and I give myself permission to be exactly where I am without stressing about tomorrow, it’s pretty amazing how much better I feel.  It also helps things unfold exactly as they’re meant to without diversions.  In addition, I find myself being able to then simply be in the moment and embrace the journey.

This isn’t to say that it’s not important to think things through and take action when you feel called.  It’s basically to say that if you’re thinking about things and clear answers aren’t coming to you, then it’s perfectly okay to give yourself permission not to know.  To tread water for a bit.  Everything becomes crystal clear in its own time.  Sometimes it just takes a while, and it may be longer than you’d like it to be.

This is also one of the most important things I find myself reminding clients of when I’m coaching – that knowing you’re exactly where you should be in this moment and releasing the need to struggle for immediate answers will take the pressure off and help things flow just as they’re meant to.  It will also keep you more open to new roads that may not have appeared for you if you hadn’t stopped to take a breath.

Even positive change can be challenging.  Decisions about making a change in your career, starting a family, launching a new project, going back to school… all those things are great, and at the same time can be pretty overwhelming if we allow them to be.  This is also the time to allow answers and guidance to come with time.

During this time, it’s also important to be kind to yourself, forgiving of yourself, and think about treating yourself the same way you would treat a good friend going through the same situation. Know that what got you into this place serves a purpose, even if the purpose hasn’t revealed itself yet.

So, here’s the deal.  Give yourself permission to not have all the answers, to take the time you need, and to feel whatever it is you’re feeling.  Be easy on yourself.  Know that everything will happen in its own time, and your job is to make the best of the ride.  This is how you’ll land on your feet, every time.  xo ~ Kristi

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Kristi Ling is a happiness strategist, internationally known life and business coach, bestselling author, and inspirational speaker who works with individuals and organizations on building a firm foundation for lasting happiness and success. She has been featured in numerous media outlets such as Oprah Daily, Woman’s Day, Oxygen, Entrepreneur, Mashable, Reader’s Digest, and Women’s Health. Her popular TEDx Talk on The Power of Re-Thinking Happiness has been shared across social media, and she has appeared as a keynote speaker for major companies and events. Her bestselling book, Operation Happiness – The 3-Step Plan to Creating a Life of Lasting Joy, Abundant Energy, and Radical Bliss was chosen by Success Magazine as one of the best books to make you successful. It’s available now wherever books and audiobooks are sold.


  • melissa

    Wow I’m so glad I found your site, I am 38 years old and I’m on year 2 of trying to recover from a bad labral hip tear repair surgery that did not go well, I am in need of both back surgery and a total hip replacement. I owned my own yoga business and was on track at the time of growing the business and taking on many jobs with local studios and gyms, I was so happy. I also was preparing to divorce. Then my entire world fell apart, I had the surgery and never recovered the same, I lost my business and am afraid to divorce because I need the medical benefits currently. But reading your story and this blog post about being exactly where I should be gives me hope so thank you for the inspiration! Namaste, Melissa

  • Christina Hagewiesche

    I am in one of those places now – worked for 33 years and lost my job 2 years before my retirement date. A month later, my only child deployed to Iraq. Am now struggling to keep my home and live on my pension which was reduced $1,000 a month because I had to retire prior to my normal retirement date. Went back to school at age 53, but my last two classes have been cancelled due to not enough students signing up. Then while trying to do my own home repairs, I fell and broke my leg. Feeling lost, alone, frustrated and abandoned. It’s extremely difficult for me not to be hard on myself…I pray alot.